Been very low

Alcohol has been a massive issue and still is

Getting therapy atm and getting better

Today started off in an unusual way for me, with that familiar sense of fatigue, a nagging headache, and an overall feeling of sleep deprivation that I hadn't experienced in quite a while.

Instantly, I knew it was going to be a challenging day. My family and I had plans, but deep down, I knew that I wasn't in the mindset to participate .

It didn't take long for my wife to sense my lack of enthusiasm and suggest cancelling our outing. I spent the entire day feeling drained and decided it was best for them to carry on without me while I stayed at home.

Fast forward to the end of the day, my family had a wonderful time, I'm laying in bed while I find myself wide awake at the stroke of midnight, wondering why sleep eludes me.

Depression can be cruel, but there are ways of managing it. I'm grateful that I no longer beat myself up over these rough days caused by my depression, and they are becoming increasingly rare. It's all about learning to coexist with it and finding ways to live life to the fullest.

As someone who struggles with depression, I know how difficult it can be to anticipate the next bad mental health day. It's been a month since my last big episode, and while I still have days when I struggle, I'm nervously awaiting the next episode, hoping it won't be severe.

Living with depression is a constant battle. It can be unpredictable, and even when you think you're doing well, it can creep up on you when you least expect it. The fear of the next episode can be overwhelming, and it's easy to get caught up in the anticipation.

But there are things that you can do to prepare yourself for the next bad mental health day. Here are some tips that have helped me:

1. Focus on the present moment: It's easy to get caught up in worrying about what might happen in the future, but focusing on the present moment can help you stay grounded. Mindfulness techniques, such as meditation or deep breathing, can be helpful for this.

2. Practice self-care: Self-care is essential for good mental health, especially when you're struggling with depression. Make sure you're taking care of your basic needs, such as getting enough sleep, eating a balanced diet, and exercising regularly. And don't forget to make time for activities that bring you joy and relaxation.

3. Stay connected: Depression can make you feel isolated and alone, but it's important to stay connected to others. Reach out to friends and family, or consider joining a support group. Having a support system can make all the difference when you're going through a difficult time.

4. Have a plan in place: Creating a plan of action for when the next episode hits can help you feel more in control. This could include things like scheduling therapy sessions, making a list of self-care activities to do when you're struggling, or reaching out to your GP for medication adjustments.

5. Be kind to yourself: Depression can make you feel like you're not doing enough or that you're a burden to others. But it's important to remember that you're not alone, and it's okay to struggle. Be kind to yourself, practice self-compassion, and don't be too hard on yourself if you have a bad day.

Anticipating the next bad mental health day with depression is never easy, but with the right tools and support, you can get through it. Remember to take it one day at a time, and know that you have the strength and resilience to overcome this challenge.

Reducing my depression medication was a difficult decision, but one I knew I had to make. I’ve been on these tablets for so long and have felt such amazing relief from them, it was always going to be hard. But taking that step, after conversations with my therapist and pharmacist, was something I was willing to do in order to be able to move on with my life feeling happier and free from the reliance on medication.

It has not been an easy journey since then, experiencing moments of extreme emotions due to occasionally coming off the tablets too quickly, but eventually I will come through this process better informed and reliant upon myself rather than chemicals.

Instead of feeling scared or helpless right now, I’m confident in the decisions I’ve made, hoping that soon enough they will pay off in better emotional health and happiness.

Remember……you are not alone, and there always somewhere you can speak to someone.